Monday, September 2, 2013

Saying Goodbye

Is never ever easy.

Even if you've said it for a million times before, it will never be easy.

You see, my parents don't work here in Malaysia. And every year for the past several years they would be back in Malaysia a few times in a year, longest will be during summer. 

This year, since I've move into my own little space with Farid, it is easier for them to come to KL as they can just stay with us. The house isn't big, but it is cosy enough to accommodate all of us. 

During Ramadhan, daddy had work in KL and the duration of their stay in KL this year is longer than the previous years. Then baby Aleesya was born, so mummy stayed with me for three weeks.

Tonight both of them will be heading back to Kelantan, and on Friday they will be returning back to Dubai. It saddens me, and I believe baby Aleesya as well as she cried after mummy and daddy left. This year feels different, as I am now a mother.

Honestly, I am scared, and I am trying to plan ahead for my family and also take each day as it comes. I'm trying to learn to understand my baby, and her cries. Sometimes I freak out when she does a certain gesture that she has never done before, forgetting that she's growing and definitely developing new skills.

I miss having mummy here with me. I really-really do. I turn to her whenever I'm doubtful of something and she will always have something to say. I wish they didn't have to go back, and that mummy can just stay here with me, but daddy said that there's a few more years till he's ending his services there.

I know I'm still in the 'pantang' period and should not be feeling sad as it might lead to post partum depression, but let me just be sad for a while more. I miss my parents so much.

Good bye and have a safe journey atuk & nenek. Aleesya will be waiting for your next return home :')

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