Monday, April 27, 2009


It's a wonder how you look back and realize that everything is behind you and nothing is coming back. Sometimes you wonder what have change you to become the person standing right before your eyes. You regret opportunities not taken, you regret actions you've taken, you regret hurting others and not making people happy. Well, that's life. Sometimes you would just hope things have been the other way round so you could have looked back and smiled with all the memories. But if you turn back time to take away all the tears and sorrow, will the happiness of the distant memory still be alive? Or would it be a different story all together? I would rather save the story as it is right now without any change.

Saturday, April 18, 2009

That's not me!

Have you ever looked into the mirror and wondered how have you become who you are today? Some may wish a different reflection might be staring back to them, wishing that time would have erased all the sorrow shown in the pair of eyes. Would you want to wake up and wonder who is that figure staring back into your eyes, a smack on your head when you realize time has passed you by without even bothering to slow down while you laze yourself to find the meaning of your life. In the end you finally realize that the thing you have been looking for has been staring right in front of you. For those lucky ones, it might still be there, static, waiting to be held in the arms. For others it might be too late and there might be nothing left to be said. Just a piece of memory that will haunt you in your sleep forever.

Mirrors may reflect a lot of things, sometimes those things that you would not want to see. It's like a reality check as if you have just woke up from a long and seemingly endless sleep.

When I looked into the mirror today, I know who I was. I just hope when I looked at it again, it would be the same old me. Changed to be better I hope...

Sunday, April 12, 2009

maybe..... He's Just Not THAT Into You

Some movies are OK, some movies are great, but it is very hard to find a movie and relate it to yourself. Usually you would just walk out of the theater thinking, 'Okay, another happy ending, life goes on' or you would just state a few sentences for example 'Well, that was good' or 'I wished I've chosen a different movie' while walking to the car holding the car keys.

But this movie left a question mark in my heart. Is it really true, that most of us are normal, and that when we find a person who would actually change for us then we are the exception? Honestly, I do not have a definite answer for this, but I think every single one of us would have their own say, own opinion and experience in this matter.

One part which I love the most was when Alex told Gigi to run and Gigi replied something that goes like 'If I keep on running away from the guys who I think likes me, there will be no one left' To me, it was a very sweet and selfless thing to say.

It is indeed true that you are entitled to find the love of your life, but would you forever want to life in question marks? The beginning of the movie was true enough, we are conditioned to think that if someone treats us like s***t, means he or she likes you. FORGET IT! If someone treats you like that, it means that person means it, nothing else.

This movie indeed is a hilarious movie, suitable for easy watching, when you are awfully tired and you just need a time away alone (or with anyone) in the movie theater, this is the movie that you are looking for. Nothing to think, just watch, laugh and leave. But there are still some undeniable facts in this movie which are hilarious but true to think about....

  • STOP thinking that someone likes you when he or she treats you like crap, calls you names or teases you till your heart aches. They're doing that because they mean it, nothing more, nothing less.
  • STOP questioning yourself about the signs and symptoms that may be due to his or her feeling towards you. It is just your imagination, nothing more than just a hallucination you create so you will not feel so bad about yourself.
  • If someone likes you, he or she would just go for it, so STOP imagining someone will come and be on their knees, begging you to come back. That is just plain fairy tale.
  • STOP thinking that someone will change for you. It will never happen, not in a million years as everyone thinks about their selves first, including you!
  • If someone doesn't call you, don't act like a desperado and try to call that person back. STOP hoping and dreaming and assuming that the person is on the other line waiting for your call. It just doesn't happen that way.
  • STOP waiting for someone that will never turn back to look for you, just MOVE ON!


Days passed by as if it would never end, I counted each and every second that passed me by as if it would just stay there and never go away. But now it is all over! Terendak Camp is over. I just cannot believe it, when I woke up in the morning finding myself sleeping soundly on my bed with my pillow and teddy next to me =)

Well, I may not say that I hate Terendak so much. It was rather fun, if you try to make it fun. The first day everyone was scared, wondering what would they do to us. We've heard loads of stories from our seniors and most of them warned us just to follow the rules and everything will be ok.

We had rotation to guard the camp at night. The first night was my rotation. Suddenly, I heard people screaming "EARTHQUAKE!" It was rather like a roll call, where the soldiers made it because it was believed that they could not sleep due to the noise we were making. In return, we were asked to cross over a swamp filled with lintah s . Ewwww..... I was scared, but thank goodness nothing went into my pants or what so ever as we had already agreed on a way to wear our socks over our pants to avoind such incidents. My shoe was wet, dirty and smelly, and I thought, it's only the first night, could it ever be worst than this?

The second day, we were trained to look for directions using a compas. This one I enjoyed so much. I just love being in the jungle, till we reached our first checkpoint and had lunch there. Then we proceeded to the base camp, which was our second checkpoint and the end of the journey. That evening it rained so I spent most of my time in the tent. That night, we had a night walk where everyone will be left in the jungle all alone. Well, you would think that you are all alone because it is so dark and you can hardly see anything but the full moon in the sky, the fireflies and the light mushrooms. Remembering my experience during the BLS camp, I think this time I felt this time I managed to pull myself together and actually had fun in the jungle all alone. Not really all alone actually. Ranpreet was just about 6 metres away, but i cannot see her at all!!! We had to stay there about one hour plus and returned to the base camp at 4am!

The third day we learned how to carry people in emergency. And some 'emergency marching'. Weird, I know, but I had fun. I was turning black as we had to stay in the sun for so long. Well, memoried from camp I guess. Prof Ikram came today, with a few other lecturers from the university as tomorrow we will be having the Disaster and Relief Medicine Field Practical. I was informed that I was to be the patient. Figures.

The fourth day, we had the practical. It was fun and we finished everything in about 4 hours. The accident is about a train collision where two trains collide with each other thus there were manu casualties. I had a left closed tibia and fibula fracture. Thanks to everyone (Zul, Amanda, Farhana, Wafaa, Nabila and Era) who helped to carry me out of the jungle! =P .. That night we had a cooking competition and we cooked something so weird. But nevermind, it tasted great!

The fifth day we learned how to march. Ok, now I am officially BLACK! Seriously, my face hurts so much due to the sunburn, I just wished this day will pass me by. That night we had BBQ which was fun followed by performances.

The last day, we had to gather to salut the soldiers in something called the 'goodbye march'. It was rather fun, and after that, everyone was more energetic than they could have ever been. Time to go home! On the bus, my sleep was disturbed by someone who asked me to help him, in return no gratitude was shown. Maybe after this I should stop helping others and think about myself more.

Terendak camp was ok, but I would never want to go through that ever again

Friday, April 3, 2009

My new look!

Whilst counting down for Terendak Camp, I adopted a new look...

Haha.. I honestly have no idea if this look suits me or not, but now I know that I just have to live with it.. LOL :P..

Not bad tho, takes out a few years from me.. Maybe this new look would bring me luck? I wish. I don't care anymore how I look, because what matters is that thing inside - your heart. Possessing a princess-like-look may not mean your heart is as pure as gold. I don't know. Maybe I'm changing. Everyone changes aite? Just hope it brings out the best in me.

Anyway, I'm dreading the day I'll be leaving to Terendak. To everyone out there, do wish me luck! Please, I need all the luck I can get!!

Wednesday, April 1, 2009

Confessions of a Shopaholic

Ok, at last I found time to go to the cinema and watch this movie. I thought it would be worth it, as it has really wide publicity and all. But I ended up wondering why did I choose this movie above all others that are now in the cinema.

To begin with, the movie does have a storyline, well, it is based on a best selling novel. But the way it is put together is kinda a bit jumbled and does not really mean anything. I would rather watch Ip Man all over again than watching this movie. I would say I did regret watching it, such a dissapointment.
This movie might entertain those who are into fashion, shopping and all that goes along with it. But for me, it does not have what it takes for me to classify is as a movie that is good. A good movie for me is not just entertaining, but it has to have more than that, more than just a pretty girl in a pretty dress finally being able to realize and tell the world what she is made of. And definitely more than just a handsome guy to be someone who falls for the pretty girl and gets together. They definitely found the right girl and guy to play the role in the movie, but not enough to make it alive.
Personally, this is just another movie where you can watch it and tell your partner what is going to happen for the next scene. It is too predictable. Do not get me wrong here, I have NOT read the book yet. I believe, as many others have too, good books does not make good movies. It is not as simple as that to put writings into life.
I regretted feeling so eager to watch this movie. Maybe it could have been much better sitting at home doing my work or studying. Seriously, literally.
There are some good things about this movie though. For instance, there were some good lines in this movie which does make me stay in my seat in the freezing cinema. I am someone who looks for good lines in movies, lyrics, posters and so on. So it made me stay. Besides that, I would have just walked out.