Saturday, August 20, 2011

Step 1

When I was young, I used to be that girl you see in a dress with a tiara in her head, dreaming of her prince charming riding my in a white stallion, saving her from an evil dragon.

As years went by, I learn that fairytales don't exist, and that they are just imaginations. No one is gonna save you, no one will care. When you love, you have to sacrifice your heart and feelings, and keep everything inside. I learnt that love is sacrifice and that nothing will be gained without it.

And I was hurt and hurt all over again. I thought it was wrong for me wanting something for myself, demanding my own happiness. I thought I had to just go with the flow and listen to the needs and wants of everyone else except myself.

Then something happened, and made me evaluate my view of life, of love, and friendship. I've always told myself that love is enough, when deep down I know it is not. And I learn to live and embrace that reality. If you can't be there in person, you can't be there at all.

Today I'm writing my own fairytale. It might not involve dragons, or horses, or a wicked witch, but it sure does involve less tears and unlimited happiness. Sometimes you do need tears to make you stronger, but you need happiness more to be able to pull yourself together and to be able to stand up and smile again. You can't live with that gloomy face forever, nor could you survive being always happy.

I've taken the step, and I'm not turning back.

And right now, I wish to be at 57, Purley Park Road.



Done with step one. Baby steps to step two :)


Counting days to April. Exams first though -.-

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