Wednesday, May 7, 2014

Overly Attached

Have you not know that I am overly attached to most of the people/things around me? Having Aleesya just made things more defined - I am overly attached on a whole new level now!

Every day before I go to work I would at least cuddle her, and memorise her scent. At around 10, after rounds, I'll call home to make sure she's alright. And once I'm home I can never let her out of my sight.

Sometimes when she sleeps I would watch her and wonder how did I get things right, to be blessed with her. I'm not perfect, far from being nice, but each day I'm trying to learn and to improve for her sake.

In a few more days (two weeks to be exact) I'll be starting my fifth posting, and during this posting I wont be able to takr any off days, unless I use up my leaves. I don't know how I'm going to get through 4 months without any leaves, I just hope Aleesya will understand. I made the decision to join this posting to enhance my skills before I get posted to the district, and that I will need this for my career in the future. What is 4 months as compared to a lifetime? 

If I can bring Aleesya to work, I really would! Not seeing her for 10-12 hours a day kills me softly inside. That's why if hubby and I are planning for an after work outing, I'll usually head home to pick her up first! Now I understand why I see people bringing their children out at night. After a whole day at work, I bet you would want to spend some time with your baby, right?

Abrupt change of subject - I'll be on a one week leave starting next week!!!! I only have a couple of days in clinic, then one day in the ward and one night shift to complete before I'm totally out. Honestly, I have mixed feelings about leaving the department. To miss it completely would be too much, but to not miss it at all will be a lie. Maybe, I do have some good memories here, and some good people that I have come to know of. But no, I wont come back. 

So my plans for the holiday? I guess I have to discuss that with hubby. He's not on leave and since he'll be leaving me this weekend to go fishing, I don't think he can take any leaves anymore. Sigh. I don't even think we have time for a short gateway. But I'm planning to bring my baby to the baby spa in Publika somewhere in the middle of the week! It has been ages and I really hope I can really bring her there this time!

Abrupt change of topic again - I love medicine. Being a doctor is my passion, but I am not sure if I just want to stop at this. Am planning something for the long run. I hope my parents will approve.

Oh well. Watched Spidey tonight. And I cried when Gwen died. 😭😭. It was just too sad!!! Sigh. 

Can I just travel the world and not bother?

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